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第四百一十四章 冒犯艺术(1 / 2)

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第415章 冒犯艺术(求订阅)

杨云逸和孙岳这对搭档上场,很多人都是尤为期待。

舞台上,一对相声演员,一张桌子,开启了在这个舞台的第一场相声。

杨云逸开口道:“大家好,来到这个舞台尤为的忐忑,首先给大家介绍一下我自己,我叫杨云逸,是来自德云楼的相声演员。站在我旁边的这位,相信诸位也看出来了,一个男人!”

孙岳不乐意了,问道:“什么玩意儿就男人了,我这是没有名字的吗?”

杨云逸笑了笑,拍了拍孙岳的肩膀说道:“以前那些节目不都这么介绍的吗?您,一个男人,五大三粗的男人。不然还怎么介绍,难道我说,这不是个男人!”

观众这一刻笑了起来,杨云逸也松了一口气。

就怕魔都的观众口味不一样,还好,没到那个地步。

孙岳拒绝的回应道:“那你也不能够这么介绍我,你说你名字,也应该报我的名字!”

杨云逸无奈的点头道:“行行行,您都这么说了,我不满足您嘛!他,孙岳,人称孙胖子!”

孙岳拉住了杨云逸,“不是,介绍我就介绍我,没必要人身攻击,我知道我胖,但伱也不能够攻击我是吧!”

底下的观众都开始欢乐的鼓掌了,别说,德云楼的相声还真的有点意思,因为他们其实现场的很多人是第一次听相声,不是说不知道相声,是他们之前对于相声没有研究过。

至于杨云逸的介绍,实际上也没有毛病,孙岳本来就是个胖子,说他胖如果是觉得在攻击他,或者侮辱他,要想不被攻击和侮辱,你倒是减肥啊!

就好像微博上,人家都鼓励你不要害怕胖,胖没有关系,胖起来一样好看。可实际上你要是真胖了,现实生活中别人会说你胖成这样球样,还好意思发照片,脸都不要了是吧!

所以啊,哦,即便别人表面上不说,心里肯定是要这么想的啊!

再说了,过度肥胖不是也是一种病嘛!

人啊,要懂得克制自己,特别食欲这块儿,真的,一点要懂得克制。

杨云逸无奈的摊了摊手:“孙老师,这我完全没有冒犯您的意思,虽然相声是一门冒犯的艺术,可我对您重来没有不尊敬过,所以咱俩不纠结这个问题了行吗,我们现在来给大家说一段正经的相声。”

孙岳点了点头,回应道:“行好不容易正正经经上一次节目,虽然你说我胖,我心里也不开心,但是你得介绍我的名字,这样观众才能够认识我!”

杨云逸也明白了,便道:“那这样,我重新介绍一下我自己。我叫杨云逸,来自德云楼的一名相声演员,也是目前德云楼的一哥。站在我旁边这位是孙岳,大家也看出来了,五短身材,肥头大耳,活脱脱的一个猪八戒!”

孙岳不乐意了:“你刚刚还说不冒犯我,现在你已经冒犯到我了,我怎么就猪八戒了。”

杨云逸转头看着孙岳说道:“这不是为了逗观众笑嘛,也没有说您就变成猪八戒了。”

孙岳回应道:“那也不行啊,我孙岳也是要脸的人,你说我是猪八戒,这节目一播出,我不久毁了嘛!”

杨云逸叹息了一声,“得嘞,我是明白了,今个算是过不起了。那我们好好说相声,今天我们给大家带来的相声是有关于文字方面的。大家都知道,现在文学方面啊,我还是很有发言权的,别人都夸我啊,是当代鲁迅,说什么杨云逸,你的文学素养好好啊,我爱你!”

孙岳推了杨云逸一把,听不下去了说道:“能不能不要那么不要脸,我已经听不下去了。”

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